This is my second blog.

My first blog chronicled my experiences over three years caring for my dad as he lived through and finally died from Alzheimer's. That is the book that is for sale.

This second blog kind of chronicles of life, what it is like to start your life over in your late 50's. After caretaking, you are damaged, file bankruptcy, and the world doesn't care what you did. After 8 months of unemployment, you wake each day knowing the world doesn't want you. Finally you do find a job, 5 weeks before homelessness, but doing what you did 30 years ago and getting paid what you did 30 years ago. So this is starting over.

The object of life is not to be on the side of the majority, but to escape finding oneself in the ranks of the insane.

Thursday, November 16, 2017


Well, looking at a three day weekend, how do I spend  an extra day?  I know!   I'll get high and watch Pink Panther cartoons all day!

Sigh, once upon a time I would have thought that a good idea and a day well spent.  When did I grow up?

Speaking of children and their urges, it just keeps getting funnier.

First this whole work guys and gals and behavior.  Let's start with Roy Moore - I have not made up my mind on this one.  Historically, I believe the women, sorry but it's true.  I know not every guy who's been accused by a woman is/was guilty and it creates an unfair burden on the guy to prove he did not do something eons ago.  So in Moore's case, suddenly a gaggle of geese come forward right before the special election for the senate: not during the primary, not during his run for governor, not during his run for state supreme court, etc.  Why?  Has the current mood and news stories empowered these women to have the courage now to step forward?  A better chance of being believed?  Well, could be, but then again, if that were the case, how come it is ONLY Moore?  There should be several/many women about many different men in politics.  So that has me scratching what is left of my hair and then we find out that a woman comes forward with Gloria Allwoodhead and I don't know about you, my imaginary reader(s) but I am of the opinion that when she is involved it's probably best to conclude the opposing side is probably the one telling the truth.  So anyways they have this yearbook where ol' dumb ass 30 something Roy signs a high school yearbook with his signature and title.

'Cept, when he knew her and was suppose to be signing the year book, that was not his title.  It was, however, his title in 1999 when he was the judge in a divorce case that was decided in the hubby's favor, and lo an behold, guess who the woman was?  Yep, very same one saying she was sexually messed with as a teenager with Roy Moore, who if both are true didn't mind the guy she dated when she was a teenager presiding over her divorce and when she ends up losing did not come out and announce the verdict should be tossed because she was involved with the judge when she was just a small lass.

So, did he really sign her yearbook back then with letters after his name that were not true, or did they take that signature off the divorce paperwork when that was his title, and super impose it on the yearbook?  I'm sure nobody is going to get the chance to check the yearbook to verify the signature.

And if she is lying in a very organized way then are the other women?  This is where the yarn starts getting tangled in the diorama in my head.  I guess it would be best to just go ahead and vote for Moore if you were planning to before all this, he can always be tarred, feathered and hung later on.  But if he drops or loses and later we find this was all a political lie to destroy the man, not much you can do about it then.

And if there is an organized effort that successfully derails Moore, guess what will be coming up in the future?  If it worked once.....

After all, all those members of the media never get in trouble for lying and reporting false stories.  They are just following procedures.

Now, let me change the subject for a moment and ask this, what do all the Hollywood men being accused of all these sexual advances have in common.  Well, let's see, they are men, have lots of money and power, and, oh yea, they all voted for Bill Clinton, twice.

Let's go get Peabody and Sherman and take a trip to the WayBack Machine and go back to the 90's.  Back then we had this really cool baby boomer as president, he played the sax, ate McDonalds and everybody loved him.  Okay, that is not totally true, after all, he only got 43% of the vote in 92 and 49% in 96 thanks to Ross Perot running in both elections to split the republican vote and if Perot had not been in the race in 92 Bill Clinton would have lost to GHWB the 1st and history would be so different today.

Next time you talk to a stupid liberal type, wait, is that redundant, point out that no Clinton running for president ever got to 50% of the vote, make them look it up and watch them wet themselves.  Then again, don't think GW the 2nd ever got 50% either.   Obama did both times, another example of how the majority just means most of the people are wrong.

But the liberals of the world loved Bill Clinton, pro abortion, pro gays, pro everything every college professor would approve of in a president..  So when a woman stepped forward, Gennifer Flowers and talked about a long term affair with the jazzman, they said so what, she's a slut.  And when Paula Jones came out with her story of 'hey baby, kiss it', the liberals, talking heads and college professors said, 'so what, she's trailer trash'.  And when Juanita Broaderick came out and said then governor of Arkansas raped her, the liberal pencil necks said ' she's a liar, don't believe her, she wants to write a book or something'.  And when news broke on Monica, the liberals said 'she's a liar, she's a fat slut, took advantage of him, wants to write a book' blah blah blah.  Then the blue dress shows up with seed stains and then the liberal media really came out blaring against the woman as being psycho.

That is why I always kind of admired Lewinsky, how she survived that and didn't end up dead or screwed up to the max is an amazing story of courage and intestinal fortitude.  How did she answer the question "so, tell me about your last job.  what did you do?  what made you stand out as a presidential intern?"

So what?  It does not affect his job etc etc etc.  They made every excuse in the book to cover Bill Clinton's ass.   Of course, later it would be known that many of these talking heads were a little on the dinky side of life, cheating on their own spouses, chasing the babes around the office themselves so they might have had something of a skewed opinion for personal self serving reasons but in the end, we should not pay attention to any of this because his work and personal life are separate, blah blah blah they blathered.

And, now this is where it really starts splitting my side, many of these today outraged Hollywood women could not get enough of Bill Clinton when he was president.  And to all of them and whoever is still reading this, WHAT THE HELL DID YOU THINK WAS GOING TO HAPPEN???

You, those Hollywood Streeps, Chers, and other chicks of plastic surgeons, YOU sent the message that if you support all the right things, you can play with and show us your Uncle Willy all you want.  It was so cute!  You not only didn't condemn the behavior, you approved of it, made jokes about it, made it cool to cheat on wife and get BJ's from girls that weren't born yet when you were in grad school and taking those long walks thru Harlem on layovers at the airport.

You adored Clinton, you heaped awards on Clinton and Polanski.  And now you are upset?

And so here we are today.  Suddenly all those men who watch Bill Clinton get away with it all and spent the last 20 years giving money and speaking out for all the right liberal issues suddenly had the carpet pulled out from under their feet and are now losing everything and don't understand why.  They are not regretful for their behavior, they are confused at why everyone is making a bid deal out of it now.

Leading us to reading how commentators are frowning their brows and asking out loud if they were now wrong about Bill Clinton.

Duh, little late and a dollar short capped toothed wonders.

Of course you were wrong.  And now this is where you watch the yarn.  If the media have been an unbiased institution back in the 1990's and gone the Nixon route on Clinton, then the right wing media never would have formed, there would have been no market vacuum for a Fox News, Briebart, Drudge, Infowars.  If the media had forced Clinton out for his behavior the way it forced Nixon out, then there would have been no Hillary.  And probably no GB the 2nd.  No Obama.  I mean the whole history of life the last 30 years would be totally different.  Better?  In many ways.  Worse, probably in some for sure.  But absolutely different.

But the point is this: the medias being Clinton's pet and supporting him when he was accused of rapes, sexual assaults, sexual harassment, etc etc etc was a CAUSE of such a befuddle messy timeline and now they want to try to appear deep and wonder aloud "maybe we were wrong?".

Sorry Charlie, the majority of Americans knew back then it was wrong, the media had it wrong, and don't really care if you soul search today.

I should have gone with the getting high and watching Pink Panther cartoons.  Growing up has it's limitations.

Outside my window is a tree
Outside my window is a tree
There only for me

And it stands in the gray of the city
No time for pity for the tree or me

There is a world of pain
In the falling rain
Around me

Is there a reason for today?
Is there a reason for today?
Do you remember?

I can hear all the cries of the city
No time for pity for a growing tree


Friday, November 10, 2017


Going to do something I said I wouldn't do, and technically can't do, but going to do anyways.

So here we go again.  Some mass killer owns an iPhone and the feds can't get into it.

Saw an article and this is what set me off, the statement by the DOJ person who said "all reasonable people agree" that the feds should have a backdoor access to these phones.

As soon as I see "all reasonable" I am pretty sure the person saying it actually has no valid way of arguing for what he or she wants.

Al Gore does this all the time.  He will say "all reasonable" or "all respected scientists" to frame whatever he is about to say that if you disagree, you are no reasonable or respected.  It's a classic frame and it lacks any logical foundation and is a sure sign that whatever is being said is just wrong.

So, DOJ, riddle me this.  Let's say you could get into the phone.  No, let's take a step back, let's say you could access any phone at any time remotely, and answer me this:  would the DOJ have prevented this mass murder?


And if you could get into the phone, what could you discover that would bring back one life?


So why do you need into the phone?

They really don't.  But they want you, the people, to think they should.  Because if you give them access to this phone in this case, then the slippery slope starts and next thing you know anyone will be stopped on the street and their data collected.

Don't tell me slippery slope is a logical fallacy, the cops have been doing this for years when they pull over people and they can download the data from the phone, well, not apple phones, but the point is they are already doing it.  AND, if you use your fingerprint on an Apple device or I assume the new Face ID, guess what, the cops, the courts have ruled, can make you open the iPhone.  What they cannot do, courts have said, is make you tell them your passcode.

It's funny this is hitting the news today, the same day wikileaks released more of those CIA/NSA hacks that someone hacked from the government and stole, now giving millions of hackers across the planet access to the coolest hacking software our government could develop.

Imagine if Apple had created a hack for the feds two years ago in another terrorist/mass murder case in CA; that hack would have been, well, hacked and now free for anyone to hack anyone's iPhone.

So back to the DOJ, what they want is access to apple devices and they use the big news cases to say "any reasonable person understands this guys information should not be private" and people nod their heads because 99% of people are no longer capable of thinking for more than 6 minutes before their trained brains need a commercial interruption.

Look at the argument this way.  Moses is walking around the desert and runs into Satan.  Now put Moses at the 100 on the scale and Satan at zero.  After they argue thru the day, thru the night and thru the next day, they finally come to an agreement, Moses moves from 100 to 95 and Satan moves from 0 to 95.

Who just won?  If you say Moses, you are wrong.  Satan won.  Because once you move a person from an absolute, Moses at 100, you only have to move him off that point and after that, it's much oh so much easier to move him further and further down till one day Moses is at 10 and scratching his head wondering what happened, how did he get this far from the path.

And that happens to all of us as we go thru life, in case you were wondering where life went wrong, go back and remember the moment you moved from your absolute stance.

Well that is what the government is doing, trying to move Apple from an absolute position to just let them get into the phones of mass murders and the day Apple relents is the end of Apple as we know it.  Because tomorrow it will be for this person, then another person and the next thing you know your phone will be opened because you didn't recycle your garbage correctly.  Or are still driving a car using gasoline.

See, I'll repeat for my new imaginary readers.  Slippery slope is currently considered a logical fallacy, but should not be; the slippery slope is the sudden understanding that you are being moved from A to B to C because someone wants you at the G spot.

Wait, better reword that, let's say the M spot.

And anyone and everyone denies such conspiracies exist!

So here is the problem.  Every college graduate that took a course in psych, sociology, etc learned the term Shaping.  Shaping is when you don't try to move your rat thru the maze all at once, you break it down into smaller steps, little by little until you get the rat to do what you want.  Successive approximations to the target behavior is the definition of shaping - which is also the definition of slippery slope.  The difference?  If you are running the experiment, it's called shaping.  If you are the rat, the one being manipulated, it's called a slippery slope.

And that is what the government is attempting to do, shape us, to get us to think that the government has the right to anyones data on their phones, pads, computers, etc.  Getting onto this guys phone in Texas is not going to save anyone's life.

See, here is what we know.  THE GUY WAS NUTS.  He beat his wife, he beat his infant kid.  He got kicked out of the Air Force for these types of things and other events.  He bought animals on craigslist to use as target practice.  He escaped a mental institution.


Oops.  Our tax dollars at work.

That is why this nut job was able to buy the guns, because repeated failures by the very same government that wants Apple to provide them the means to get into any iPhone.  So if you really want to know who is at fault - it's the federal governments fault this happened.  Other than the shooter himself, it's all on the federal government.  Which now makes twice the federal government has been involved in mass killings at a church, if you want to count Waco.  And I do.

My attitude?  Everyone in the country should dump whatever they are using and buy an iPhone, don't use the fingerprint or face id, put in an 8 digit passcode, memorize it, and stop the government from being able to access anyone's phones for good.  Not that it would be self serving for me to suggest that solution.

And by the way, while on the subject of manipulation, did you read the interview of one of Facebooks original founders?  It discussed how they use behavior mod in the design of facebook for the purpose of addicting the user, knowingly they designed software to brainwash you, manipulate you, addict you.

Told you Facebook, Instagram etc were evil.  Too bad all my readers are imaginary.

And I should know by now, I should know by now
I hear them call it out all around
Oh, they go ah, there's nothing to believe in
Hear them ah, just daydreams, deceiving
They'll just let you down

So what if you reached the age of reason
Only to find there was no reprieve?
Would you still be a man for all seasons?
Or would you just disbelieve?

We measure our gains out in luck and coincidence
Lanterns to turn back the night
And put our defeats down to chance or experience
And try once again for the light

Some wait for the waters of fortune to cover them
Some just see the tides of ill chance rushing over them
Some call on Jehovah, some cry out to Allah
Some wait for the boats that still row to Valhalla

While you try to accept what fates are unfolding
While some say they're sure where the blame should be falling
You look 'round for maybe a chance of forestalling
But too soon it's over and done
And the man for all seasons is lost behind the sun


Read an article yesterday about the British economy.  Seems with the exit of the EU, many foreigners who've been living and working in Britain that past 10 or 15 years are now moving back to mainland Europe where they will stay in the EU.

Now this is choice, what is happening now in Britain is wages are rising, salaries, hourly rates across the board are rising and Brits who've been out of work for years are able to go back to work at better wages because all the foreign workers leaving the country.


Thursday, November 9, 2017


Someone once defined zombies as people who walk around aimlessly, with glazed over eyes, never thinking for themselves, following orders and I thought SHAZAM! democrats are the party of the zombies!

Tuesday night, democrats are crowing over their landslide.  Except, one small problem.  First New Jersey.  It voted in a democrat governor.  So what, they almost always have a democrat for governor, two democrats for senators, a state government run by democrats. Democrats run that state the way they run Chicago.  New Jersey democrats winning back the governors mansion is not really a story.  Chris Christy being elected governor in the first place is amazing.  Getting re elected was a miracle.  But the beached whale leaving office in scandal and the democrats taking it back is not special.

And Virginia, well, that has become a democrat party state.  Shocking would  have been a republican winning there again.  The urban democrats outnumber the rural area population and it will take a serious scandal or collapse for republicans to take back Virginia.  Look at the last time a republican candidate carried Virginia.  Virginia is no longer part of the south, it's now part of the NE corridor of Virginia, Maryland, Delaware, New Jersey, New York, Connecticut, Mass and Rhode Island.  All Zombies all the time.

I think the test is Alabama Senate race with Roy Moore.  And that got interesting today with several women coming forward saying nearly 40 years ago when he was in his early thirties he had a taste for young underage girls.  True?  Who knows.  Could all be dirty politics.  Could all be true too, that's the nice thing about people who run for offices, nothing would surprise me.

Speaking of which, Donna Brazille's new book certainly shows the nuts were right last fall.  First, her revelations surrounding Seth Rich being murdered and how she was afraid for her life?  And even more important, well, except to Seth Rich, is they were considering replacing Hillary on the ticket for health reasons in September, she really did have to end speeches due to coughing fits and she really did badly stumble on 9/11 and she really was in bad shape and all the 'alt right' sites were correct.

But, and this is great, she talks how the media helped cover it all up!  CNNBABCBSNYLATWP etc all worked with the DNC to cover up Hillary's health problems.

You just gotta love it.  And sorry, I hit post instead of save last night when I was not finished.

Good to see that Mel Gibson is starting to get back to work in Hollywood, I guess after seeing the number of pedophiles molesting young boys, slimy guys using the naked back rub ploy to get hot young wanna be actresses to roll in the hay, I just guess being an ugly drunk that spouts hatred towards jews could become the new cool in Hollywood.  "Sorry Mel, we don't care you are an ugly drunk, we're just happy to have a star that doesn't molest the children or corn hole the extras on the set!"

Which brings us to today's great philosophical question:  If Kevin Spacey were  being accused of molesting/raping/whatever only Hebrew men, would he be more popular in our age of anti semitism?

That funny question is deeper than I can appreciate, I suspect.

And let's not forget the king of all this perversion, a man whom Hollywood has known for decades for his taste for underage girls, Roman Polanski.  Good ol' Roman, stuck over in Europe, unable to travel to the US lest he be picked up for one of those hot tub drug booze things with a 15 year old girl and, this is where it's great, look at all these outraged actors and actresses the past few weeks, their shock that this kind of thing has been going on, and go back and google all the wonderful things they've said about Roman Polanski over the last 30 years and how unfair it is that Roman can't come back to the states to pick up this Oscar for we love him so much.

Why are Henry and Kevin and others now lepers in the movie industry that has for 30 years adored Roman Polanski?  That is deeper than anyone in Hollywood can appreciate, I suspect.

And since this week is the 50th anniversary of the release of Days of Future Past by the Moody Blues

Dawn is a feeling
A beautiful ceiling
The smell of grass
Just makes you pass
Into a dream

You're here today
No future fears
This day will last
A thousand years
If you want it to

You look around you
Things they astound you
So breathe in deep
You're not asleep
Open your mind

You're here today
No future fears
This day will last
A thousand years
If you want it to

Do you understand
That all over this land
There's a feeling
In minds far and near
Things are becoming clear
With a meaning

Now that you're knowing
Pleasure starts flowing
It's true life flies
Faster than eyes
Could ever see

You're here today
No future fears
This day will last
A thousand years
If you want it to

Friday, November 3, 2017


Oh my, oh my, for the cynical politically incorrect smart ass, has there ever been a better time to be alive?

Except for all the jokes I can make up, like "This Fall, NBC brings you the best in police dramas, Kevin Spacey and Andy Dick star as undercover gay cops in Fudgepacker and Facelicks" but the problem is reality can always find something funnier than what I can make up.

The shock of many that Spacey is gay?  Seriously, wasn't there a story about 10 or 15 years ago of him being mugged outside a public restroom in London at 3am?  Duh.

How about a member of Congress has come out, no, not that kind of come out, and insisted that congress needs to investigate pedophiles in Hollywood.  Yea, that sounds like a plan, I'm sure they will get to the bottom of something but it won't be truth.  Congress should team up with the catholic priesthood to investigate pedophiles in Hollywood.  Sounds like a can't miss investigation.

Here is something that is bothering me though, well besides all the rape, molestation, etc.  Where are the child actors/actresses of the 90's?  The silence from Alyssa Milano or Christina Applegate for example?  There are two young actresses that went thru their teen years on TV and blossomed into two of the most attractive women ever produced and not a peep.  Crap, Milano is always one of those tweeting has beens in Hollywood anti Trump pro whatever is immoral twitters of stupidity but strangely silent now.  Wonder why.

And no, never watched the show Milano was in, did see some episodes of Married with Children - loved the episode where Applegate character graduates from high school and is proudly holding up her diploma in the living room then hands it to her mom and says "well, read it to me!!!".

That was funny.

This just in, Dustin Hoffman is apparently something of a creep, but now we have reached the point the Catholic Church reached when it comes out a priest is molesting underage girls and people think, well, at least it was girls.  So all the babes Dustin groped will apparently be taking a back seat now and told to shut up, at least Dustin was straight.

So what is my point this morning?  To make fun of gays?  Nope.  To make fun of pedophilia?  Nope.  To make fun of the rich and powerful using their positions to abuse children and teenagers?  Nope.

The point of all of this is the slide of our society into decadence and immorality that is now so widespread it has engulfed every facet of life in America today.  And we have brainwashed generations into a position that anyone who points out the perversion, anyone who stands up and says God is going to judge us as a nation is ridiculed by the same actors, writers, news people, politicians, etc that are the perverts.

From boardrooms to oval offices to our homes via TV, we have allowed rich powerful people to have their ways for years.  Last month, Sally Quinn, the below average reporter chick who married Ben Bradly and ran the Washington Post and wrote the religion column for years writes a book where she basically comes out as a witch of some sort and thinks three times she cursed some people who later died and literally believes she is some major witch power.  This woman ran the Washington DC social scene for 30 or 40 years, who was critical of Christianity for decades in her column, turns out to be a major witch and you don't think she has a big following in DC?

And hardly an eyebrow is raised at the news.

Wiccans and such is the fastest growing religion in America today.  Our parents and grandparents who grew up dragging the Baby boomers to churches and those BB who later rejected such religious behavior have raised X's and Mil's with no God and now here we are.

I'm suppose to be praying to God to have mercy on our nation but seriously am having a difficult time asking 'Why?'.  Why should I be praying to spare a nation of perversion, a nation that a select few are now robbing the middle class of all their earnings to support their perversions.

Oh yea, and prince William over there in England is taking after his dad and announced there are too many people on the planet, the William with two kids and another baking in the oven.  Which means what he is really saying isn't there are too many people, just too many of the wrong kind of people, you know, commoners.  There are never enough inbred wealthy snobs who never have to work a day in their life and live off the backs of the people 'beneath' them.

Baking in the oven is slang for wife pregnant, when talking about the rich and powerful, I don't assume there are not a few actually baking babies in the oven.  There are rumors of blood doping with young kids to help slow down aging and I can almost see a farm of young kids being drained of blood to supply the members of congress, the boardrooms, the Hollywood elite with fresh young blood to keep them looking young.

Laugh now, just wait.

What people never seem to understand or learn, is that when a pendulum swings, it always swings back.  Look at the roaring 20's, a time of easy money, loose morals, good times and when it swung back we had 15 years of depressions, a world war and then about 20 years of a moral society, up to the JFK killing then it started swinging back to the left and has pretty much had a free run since the late 60's to today.

You know what is fun, just think back to the 1990's and Bill Clinton and how many of these people in the news today were supporters of Clinton, who's list of women he sexually abused is longer than my, um, arm.   Bill Clinton made whipping out Uncle Willy cool, everyone of these people in the news today were supporters of Bill Clinton - there's a point there, not sure what, but it's important.

Look, let me be clear here about something.  I could care less if Spacey or anyone is gay.  It's their life.  What bothers me is when the gay community insists that I think like they do, sorry, not going to happen.  It's a sin.  Live with it if you want, but it is a sin in the Bible.  So is adultery, so is sex outside of marriage, so is stealing, lying, murder and so on.  I'm not a better person in the eyes of God than Spacey because I'm straight and he's not, I've got more than enough sinning in my life to keep God busy and me crying on judgement day.

What I hate, what I despise, is a person, straight or gay, who forces themselves on underage boys or girls.  What I hate, what I despise, are the rich and powerful who think they can run over people's lives and continually get away with it.

And that is why I am enjoying this so much.

There are a group of rich and powerful men who have for decades used their position of power and influence to force women, men, boys and girls to satisfy their immorality and thought they were going to get away with it and now the house of cards, no pun intended, is falling and they are going to be ruined and I love it.

From the boardrooms to the Hollywood sets to Washington DC, let the mighty perverts be exposed.  Let the mighty perverts fall.  The truth be told though the heavens be damned, though in this case it might better read, May the truth be exposed and Hell be damned.  Thank you God for answering this prayer and continuing to expose these people.

God will declare me a sinner on judgment day, for that I am sure.  I pray His only begotten Son will step forward and say my sins are covered.  Don't misunderstand this.  When judgement comes on the USA, it will be huge, it will be ugly, it will be unimaginable.  And I probably will not survive what is coming, but that is fair, for what have I done about any of this?  Other than write a blog no one reads, a lone voice with imaginary readers will not be a defense on the day of reckoning.

But I am not going to be embarrassed by enjoying watching the mighty fall.  I might even make popcorn to watch the show.

The great ones never last
They burn out way too fast
The great ones they never learn
They just tumble when it's their turn

"Eat Cake!" said Miss Marie
"Heads will roll if ya stick with me!"
What's to do at Waterloo?
Stand back and enjoy the view

The price of sin, the wage of war
Don't matter we come back for more
'Cause every Judas has his price
Every angel has their vise

Oh, how the mighty have fallen
Watch the mountains crumble to the sea
Oh, how the mighty have fallen
Ya make one false move...you're history