A MIND FOREVER VOYAGING THROUGH STRANGE SEAS OF THOUGHT, ALONE


This is my second blog.

My first blog chronicled my experiences over three years caring for my dad as he lived through and finally died from Alzheimer's. That is the book that is for sale.

This second blog kind of chronicles of life, what it is like to start your life over in your late 50's. After caretaking, you are damaged, file bankruptcy, and the world doesn't care what you did. After 8 months of unemployment, you wake each day knowing the world doesn't want you. Finally you do find a job, 5 weeks before homelessness, but doing what you did 30 years ago and getting paid what you did 30 years ago. So this is starting over.



The object of life is not to be on the side of the majority, but to escape finding oneself in the ranks of the insane.

Saturday, October 29, 2016

NOT WORTH AN EXTRA BUCK AN HOUR

I don't often talk about work here, well, because I don't.

But part of the purpose of this blog was to talk about what it is like starting life over in your 50's, after you care for a loved one dying and are left bankrupt and having to start from scratch.

For my long term imaginary readers, you know what I went through, spending 8 months unemployed after my dad died and then finally landing a job with a really great company.  Doing what I did 30 years ago.  Starting pay was what I made, 30 years ago - except it has 1/2 the buying power.

But for 2.5 years I've been plugging away and the job is fine.  Have  a great manager now who pretty much lets me be me and doesn't get in my way, sees that whatever I am doing is working with customers big time and just let's me be an outlier.

Reviews came up recently, lets see how I can word this, graded in three areas, say 1 2 or 3  and most people get 2's, you are in trouble if you get 3's and I got two 2's and one 1 and when it came to a raise I got, well, less than a buck an hour.  Life in the 21st century.  Hard to get excited about it, though as I will point out I have a job, it does pay okay though I'm still technically below the median income in Colorado.

Back in the 80's, when I got my first phone support job, owner came to me after 3 months and increased my pay by 4k because I was doing so well, then another 4k at my one year review.  Somewhere along the line, people have mistakenly replaced 'k' with '%'.  When did that happen?

But this is where life's questions come up.  After 2.5 years with this great company, would companies out there in the world who wouldn't give me the time of day now find me attractive?  But then why would I go to them?  Don't I owe this company my loyalty, since they kept me from being homeless?

So it comes down to making a choice of riding out life with this company, making much less than I use to, happily accepting under 5% raises each year or do I get ambitious again?  Part of me wants to be ambitious again, yet another part of me is like settle down, ride the wave, you need to work till you die, what is the hurry, ride this as long as you can.  Grass isn't always greener, the economy sucks still, stay put, stay under the radar.

These are the things you have to think about as you approach 60.

Just tonight, I stood before the tavern
Nothing seemed the way it used to be
In the glass, I saw a strange reflection
Was that lonely man really me?

Those were the days, my friend
We thought they'd never end
We'd sing and dance forever and a day
We'd live the life we'd choose
We'd fight and never lose
Those were the days, oh yes, those were the days

Through the door, there came familiar laughter
I saw your face and heard you call my name
Oh, my friend, we're older but no wiser
For in our hearts, the dreams are still the same


SARA MCLACHLAN ON A FALL SATURDAY AFTERNOON

One of my guilty pleasures is listening to Sara McLachlan, and something about a sunny fall afternoon, leaves are falling, and listening to Afterglow Live.

Listen as the wind blows
from across the great divide,
Voices trapped in yearning,
memories trapped in time,
The night is my companion
and solitude my guide,
Would I spend forever here
and not be satisfied?

And I would be the one
to hold you down,
kiss you so hard,
I'll take your breath away
and after I'd wipe away the tears,
Just close your eyes dear


How can a world that produces life and talent like that produce an election like this?  And yes, I know Possession is not on the Afterglow Live album, work with me here, okay?

Can this get any funnier?  I mean this week Michael Moore came out and said something that nailed it, and I'm thinking how crazy is this when Michael Moore makes sense?

Moore began by saying he knew a lot of people in Michigan who were going to vote for Trump who “were not racists or rednecks” but were sick of their jobs being offshored to places like Mexico.
Trump’s promise to slap a 35% tariff on Ford cars made in Mexico and sent back to America was “music to the ears of people in Michigan and Ohio and Pennsylvania and Wisconsin,” added Moore.

“Whether Trump means it or not is kind of irrelevant because he’s saying the things to people who are hurting and it’s why every beaten down, worthless, forgotten working stiff who used to be part of what was called the middle class loves Trump,” said Moore, arguing that Trump was the “human molotov cocktail that they’ve been waiting for – the human hand grenade that they can legally throw into the system that stole their lives from them.”

According to Moore, these disenfranchised Americans have lost everything they have but still enjoy the great equalizer – the right to vote – and they will utilize it by putting “a big f**king X in the box by the name of the man who has threatened to upend and overturn the very system that has ruined their lives – Donald J. Trump.”

The film maker noted that “the elites who ruined their lives hate Trump, corporate America hates Trump, Wall Street hates Trump, the career politicians hate Trump, the media hates Trump.”
Asserting that his voters will “get to blow up the whole God damn system,” Moore concluded by saying, “Trump’s election is going to be the biggest f**k you recorded in human history, and it will feel good.”  (copied from the infowar.com website because I'm the only person left on the internet who actually sources)

I mean does that drive the nail home with a single blow of the hammer or what?

Through this world I've stumbled
so many times betrayed,
Trying to find an honest word,
to find the truth enslaved,
Oh you speak to me in riddles
and you speak to me in rhyme
My body aches to breathe your breath,
you words keep me alive,

And I would be the one
to hold you down,
kiss you so hard,
I'll take your breath away
and after I'd wipe away the tears,
Just close your eyes dear


And now we find out that Anthony Weiner and his now ex wife Huma were not only the strangest most bizarre couple in history of coupledom, but apparently great librarians of porn and classified information from the federal government.  Huma apparently did what most of us have done and emailed home stuff to work on that night, except most of us are not emailing highly classified information to a computer shared by a spouse who likes to flirt and who knows what with 15 year old girls over the internet.

I'm sorry, maybe I'm out of touch, but what the hell is this society's fascination with sending naked pictures of yourself - somehow we all woke in a world where everyone thinks they are hot and I'm sorry, we are not.  Maybe 1 out of 100 are hot and I'd bet I wouldn't even find pictures of, oh crap, my total lack of knowledge of who is famous in Hollywood is shining thru, I can't think of anyone.  The point is, Weiner, you ain't hot, neither is your ex wife.  WOULD EVERYONE STOP SENDING CREEPY NAKED PICTURE OF THEMSELVES, PLEASE?

However, by hot I mean attractive naked, right now the two of you are burning hot.  Would not be surprised to see a news story soon of a murder suicidy thing involving the two of you where Vince Foster leaves a business card, if you get my drift.

Can you imagine the wrath of Hillary on whom she blames for losing this election?

you live in a church
where you sleep with voodoo dolls
and you won't give up the search
for the ghosts in the halls
you wear sandals in the snow
and a smile that won't wash away
can you look out the window
without your shadow getting in the way


I almost rented All The Presidents Men this weekend, but decided it would be too sad to watch.  What a shame what happened to the media in this country, what once could bring a president down or disqualify a person to be president and now, with Hillary, it's obvious nothing as long as you can pay off the right people, have blackmail evidence against others, and a yapping puppy dog media willing to go along for a tickle behind the ears occasionally.

I think all democrats should write in the name of Gary Hart for president as an apology.

It's becoming blatantly obvious to me that neither Hillary or Trump, will fulfill the 4 years in office.  Hillary is guaranteed to be indicted and impeached for crimes and Trump will fall to some patsy shooter organized by our shadow government, guaranteeing Pence or Kaine will fall in line with the globalist agenda.

Forget the new furniture, time to add 6 months of emergency food, buy some silver coins, and another 250 rounds of ammo, and get ready to batten down the hatches, we are in for some evil times coming our way folks.

Not even Sara can get me out of this funk.

Into this night I wander,
it's morning that I dread,
Another day of knowing of
the path I fear to tread,
Oh into the sea of waking dreams
I follow without pride,
Nothing stands between us here
and I won't be denied

And I would be the one
to hold you down,
kiss you so hard,
I'll take your breath away
and after I'd wipe away the tears,
Just close your eyes dear


Sunday, October 23, 2016

A LETTER TO HILLARY VOTERS

This is an open letter to all those thinking of voting for Hillary Clinton and why you should not.

Last night I watched a rerun of a Dr. Who episode, the one with Simon Pegg as the guest star, where this giant ship orbits the earth, providing all the news to the planet, all designed to keep the people passive and under control.  How close we are to this today.  I mean, the news media in this country is every bit as fraudulent as Baghdad Bob or the old Soviet News Agency.

First, let's talk Wikileaks.  Are you paying attention to them?  If you get all your 'news' from the NYT, WP, WSJ, CBSNBCABCCNNMSNBC, GOOGLE/YAHOO,  the answer is no.  So let me quickly highlight an overview of what is in the wikileaks stuff, which comes directly from the emails of Hillary and people working for Hillary.


  1. The mainstream media, on this blog known as DemBitches, is totally in bed with the democratic party to the point of writing stories given to them by democrats or showing their stories to the powers of the democratic party before turning them in at work to make sure they are approved.
  2. Pay for play.  I mentioned yesterday the sweet deal Hillary worked out with Russia for 20% of the Uranium in this country and all Russia had to do was contribute a few million to the Clinton Foundation and give Bill this really good million dollar speaking tour in Russia.
  3. The Clinton Foundation collected millions and millions of dollars for relief aid in Haiti.  Less than 6% of the money collected was distributed in Haiti.  However, many companies were given millions to build hospitals, schools, homes, and roads in Haiti by the Clinton Foundation and as of yet not a brick has been laid.
  4. How the democratic party stole the primary election from Bernie Sanders.
I will stop right there.  Four simple reasons, documented in thousands of emails, that show large corruption.  And this is who you want?  This is the America you dream of?  This is not conspiracy theory people, this is documented for your reading pleasure if you take a moment out of NFL Sunday or from taking your 1,343,048 selfie to post to Facebook.

For the life of me, I can't understand how any person who was for Bernie Sanders can say now they will vote for Hillary.  She stole the primary election, the press worked for them to bury Sanders, she is on record calling Sanders supporters all sorts of variety of losers.  IT'S ALL DOCUMENTED IN THE EMAILS PEOPLE.   

Let me put it this way, there were two candidates in this election year that were going to shake rattle and roll the establishment and corruption; Bernie and Donald.  If Bernie had won the democratic nod and Cruz or Rubio or Kasich had won the republican nod, I'd be writing blogs supporting Bernie.  But to have that passion for Bernie and now walk into the voting booth and vote for Hillary is to give up, give in, and bend over and shout 'thank you sir, may I have another?" 

What will four years of Hillary be like?  What will America become under Hillary?  Let's look at what she's said.

  1. Immigration.  The 30 million illegal aliens in this country will become citizens.  In fact, Hillary, in a speech to Goldman Sacs, dreams of a world where there are no borders, one big hemisphere where people can work and move around all they want.  That is her dream, is that what you want?  This will not raise the standard of living to the rest of the hemisphere to what America is today, it will lower the standard of living in the USA and Canada to what it is in the poorest parts of the hemisphere.  Is this what you want?  Because this is what you are going to get.
  2. H-1B.  A pet peeve of mine.  Law allows corporations who cannot fill highly technical jobs with Americans to subcontract with companies in India or China to bring in those highly trained low paid workers from overseas to fill those gaps.  Says right in the law that corporations cannot use H-1B to replace American workers with low paid alternatives.  How is this working out?  Corporations absolutely love this law.  Corporations want it expanded.  Hillary speaks glowingly of the two companies in India most corporations are using and those two companies showered cash into her campaign and The Clinton Foundation.  So what is the problem?  Well, everyone is ignoring that "cannot use H-1B to replace American workers". The corporations are ignoring it and the justice department under Obama is ignoring it and over the last eight years hundreds of thousands of Americans have not only lost their jobs but they are literally 'forced' to train their replacements if they want any kind of severance pay.  Twenty plus years with a company and if you don't train your replacement, out the door with two weeks pay.  Now hear this:  Hillary plans to expand this law.  Hillary plans to expand it's usage.  So when you vote for Hillary, I hope and pray in 2017 or 2018 you will show up at work and be told you are being replaced by some bloke from India, you will have to suffer the humiliation of training the bloke, and then you can write the president and watch her laugh at you.
  3. There are 96,000,000 unemployed people in this country between the ages of 18 and 65.  There are around 150,000,000 people working between the ages of 18 and 65.  But wait, you cry, that can't be right!  Unemployment is only 5%!!!  Well, quick lesson for you.  The unemployment rate only measures the people collecting an unemployment check, once your 26 weeks are up, you don't have a job?  Tough, you are no longer considered unemployed by the government.  That 96,000,000 is about 25,000,000 more than it was in the 90's and 2000's.  For eight years, that number has hardly moved in any direction.  That is the Obama economic plan result.  Low growth, high unemployment.  And Hillary says she is going to continue the plan, with a few modifications.
  4. ObamaCare becomes Working Person Pays for Everyone's HealthCare.  See, here is a little secret.  ObamaCare was never meant to succeed.  It was meant to fail.  We were blatantly lied to; remember keep your doctor?  They knew that wasn't true - documented.  Remember cost less than cable?  A policy has just about now doubled in cost, more than doubled the out of pocket from what it was.  They KNEW it would implode and the solution will be universal single payer healthcare.  Colorado is about to vote on that state wide with a 10% payroll tax to pay for it.  And thus the problem, remember #1?  150 million working, 96 million not working?  That means the tax will require, and have to be high enough for the 150 million to not only pay for their health care but also the health care of 96 million plus those under 18 and over 65.  And by the way, notice anything else?   A single person will pay the same % as the married guy with a wife and four kids at home - that fair?  Are you working now?  Do a little math and take out 10% of your take home pay from each check.  What is that?  $100 bucks, $150?  That is how much less you will have to spend in the economy, which means what?  Slower economy, fewer jobs, see the slippery slope here people? (Technically, in Colorado, 3.5% is out of paycheck and 6.5% is paid by employer, but that is an additional 6.5% the company is paying for you and 6.5% that you will never see in a raise)
  5. Of course, history has taught us many things, well, for those who pay attention to it.  And Hillary does have a plan, it's war with Russia.  What this planet needs, she thinks,  is a good world war to cull the populations of the America's, Europe, Asia, Russia, Africa, and the middle east.  Call me a nut, but remember if you live, you read it here first.  Hillary getting elected will mean a war with Russia and I hate to say it, but we won't win that war.  Not saying Russia will win it either, cause when it happens there will be no winners.  Unfortunately, megalomaniacs always think they will survive, so Hillary thinks we can start the war, bomb the shit out of Russia, China, and stop them from hitting us though Europe, Japan, S. Korea will probably take a few hits with minor damage in this country to NY, Detroit, and a few other cities, heck, Hillary would probably nuke them herself to clear out the deadwood and then we would be able to manufacture again - hey, not making this up, this is actually the war game plans they play.  Think I'm nuts?  Russia just ran a war scenario where they attempted to move 40 million people out of the cities to the in mountain shelters they've spent the last 20 years building.
  6. By the way, if a nuclear war doesn't bother your liberal wine tasting ketchup on your hotdog little brain, just remember a nuclear war kills trees, birds, field mice and the speckled peckered salamanders too.  And we too have those underground hiding places but you and I are not invited and will be shot trying to get to them.
  7. Do you enjoy reading websites and blogs?  Well, kiss most of them goodbye.  This blog site will be shut down for sure, well, eventually, it's probably flying under the radar but they will get around to it eventually.  Because Hillary envisions a world where the alternative media is gone, where gun ownership by people not in the elite or defense of the elite, will be outlawed, where corporations rule, where the media and government are one and the same.
I feel sorry for millennials, I'm old.  I am just about to complete my 6th decade on the planet.  I've lived, loved, lost, succeeded, failed, laughed, cried, and rested many times over.  I watch the millennials run like lemmings towards the cliff, I guess this is my chance to say stop, but it's wasted, I know.  There is an east wind coming, as Sherlock would say.  But most will never see it coming until it gets over them and then wonder what the hell happened.


Saturday, October 22, 2016

MY 50TH ANNUAL ELECTION PREDICTION!!!!

Yes, it's that time imaginary readers when I stick my neck out and make my election prediction for the next presidential election.  Unfortunately, I've never been right, but I don't let failure after failure stop me from looking like a blooming idiot once again.

That being said, all these predictions are based upon one false premise.  That the 30,000,000 illegal aliens in this country right now will not be voting.  This premise is why I am never correct in my predictions, because truth be told, millions and millions of illegal aliens who are not able to vote legally do vote in our elections and many more than once.  So when predicting how states like AZ, CO, MI, TX and others will go, it only takes 3 million illegal aliens to change one or two states from republican to democrat.

Nor can I understand what the hell the people of Utah are doing.  It seems there is a 3rd party candidate in Utah that is polling 30% of the vote and might actually win the state, thus removing their 6 electoral votes from Trump.  Wouldn't that be a kick, if the election is decided in Clinton's favor because the morons of Utah voted for some slick hick in their state and we get 4 years of Clinton instead of 4 years of Trump; 30 years of liberal supreme court decisions all because the people of Utah went total moron.

Remember this little fact: If not for Ross Perot in 1992, Bill Clinton would never have been elected president (Bill Clinton in two elections, never got to 50% of the vote - in fact, in 2000, when Bush lost the popular vote, he still had a higher % of the vote than Clinton ever got).  The point of this is, Perot's 3rd party run gave us two terms of Clinton and now Utah may allow another Clinton in office with a 3rd party vote.

But, okay, here we go with the electoral map predictions!!!!!


Okay, the first map is my prediction of what this election will look like with no illegal alien multiple voting democratic systems working so it's a relatively free and accurate election.  Michigan and Pennsylvania will go Trump along with Florida and Colorado.







Now this next map is more interesting, assuming Colorado, Michigan, PA and NV go Clinton, what we have here is a 269 to 269 tie.  Talk about a cluster bomb of epic proportions.  Picture this further, a tie between the two, let's say Trump wins popular vote, and the senate is tied 50/50 after the election.


Can you say civil war?  What would happen is if the new senate votes 50/50, Biden would cast the vote for Clinton and the tie with the fewer popular votes would be president.  Or, let's say Utah goes third party and now the vote is Clinton 269 and Trump 263 with Utah's 6 going to a third party.  Trump wins popular vote.  Senate is 51/49 republican.  Think the democrats are going to be happy with the outcome?


Now the pea under the mattress in all this is Maine, which it looks like right now is going to split.  Their votes of 4 but they are split 3/1, meaning, right now in polling, Clinton is leading in the areas that get the 3 votes, Trump in the areas that have the 1 vote, so if this map happens, then Trump would win 270 to 268.

But, once again, the joker in the deck is illegal alien voting and how FL, TX AZ, CO, MI and other states could see the election turn on illegal aliens voting once, twice, three times.

Frankly, Trump could have run a much better campaign.  Wikileaks has provided so much information, so much detail of the corruption of Hillary and the Clinton Foundation.  As Secretary of State, she brokers a deal with Russia for 20% of the Uranium in the United States.  The Russian companies contribute over 100 million dollars to the Clinton Foundation.  Bill gets a multi million dollar speaking tour in Russia.  And all the media Dembitches can talk about is Donald Trump cornering Mary Sue Finkelstein in the 3rd grade on the playground and kissing her.

I don't know my imaginary readers, I've got this list of things to do and buy coming up.  Was looking at getting a new winter coat, mine is over 25 years old now, new furniture for the living room, and the catalytic converter finally fixed on my car with the extra paycheck and overtime I'll earn the next two months.  If Hillary is elected, then I'm getting a new 9mm conceal carry Walther, ammo, my permit to cancel carry, and maybe another 6 months of emergency food supplies plus extra bags of dog food, a good 4 season tent, sleeping bag and other supplies like a bag of old silver quarters for barter.

Did you catch the comments by the British General yesterday?  Basically, he said that war with Russia is on the horizon, that the US has basically already declared the war, and that the brilliant idea to let the baltic states into the NATO has guaranteed the coming war and when it's over, life on earth as we've known it will be over.

If this nation elects Hillary, all 50 states may soon be red, with the blood of 300 million people.  On the plus side though, all those illegal aliens will run back to Mexico and we won't have to worry about them anymore.

So my prediction?  Trump wins and Hillary becomes president due to 30 million illegal aliens voting, the borders will be removed and we will all be speaking spanish, chinese, aramaic or russian by this time 2020, well, if any of us are still alive.

Some things in life are bad.
They can really make you mad.
Other things just make you swear and curse.
When you're chewing on life's gristle,
Don't grumble. Give a whistle.
And this'll help things turn out for the best.
And...

Always look on the bright side of life.
Always look on the light side of life.


If life seems jolly rotten,
There's something you've forgotten,
And that's to laugh and smile and dance and sing.
When you're feeling in the dumps,
Don't be silly chumps.
Just purse your lips and whistle. That's the thing.
And...

Always look on the bright side of life.
Always look on the right side of life,


For life is quite absurd
And death's the final word.
You must always face the curtain with a bow.
Forget about your sin.
Give the audience a grin.

Enjoy it. It's your last chance, anyhow.
So,...

Always look on the bright side of death,
Just before you draw your terminal breath.

Life's a piece of shit,
When you look at it.
Life's a laugh and death's a joke. It's true.
You'll see it's all a show.
Keep 'em laughing as you go.
Just remember that the last laugh is on you.
And...



Thursday, October 13, 2016

ALL THE PRESIDENT'S BITCHES

While most of the world is massively upset with Donald Trump using the 'P' word 11 years ago, Wikileaks has been releasing thousands and thousands of emails and, well, there are tons of things to talk about, but the one thing that shines throughout the emails is how mainstream media reporters are totally owned by Clinton's and the Democrats.

I wonder what Woodward and Bernstein think about all of this.

As a young lad, I remember those Nixon years, the stories in the papers and the news, the downfall and resignation of Nixon.  I read the book All The Presidents Men when it came out, saw the movie and unlike millions, did not want to change my major to be a journalist.

Thank heavens.

Woodward and Bernstein dug thru things and uncovered corruption at the highest levels of government and brought down a president.  Millions were motivated by their efforts, book, and the movie and majored in journalism, dreaming of greatness, dreaming of bringing down powerful corrupt politicians.

And how does that story end?  Those millions became DemBitches.

DemBitches who go out of their way to grease the life for democrats, especially like the Clintons.
DemBitches who provide Hillary with debate questions ahead of time, DemBitches who write stories and let the Clinton's read it first, DemBitches who help spread the lies of a corrupt couple.

Imagine Woodward and Bernstein providing Nixon with everything they had, writing stories supporting Nixon.  And if it were not for Wikileaks, nobody would know any of this - oh wait, nobody does know anything about this because the DemBitches are talking about it on their shows and in their reports, they got a hot new story of some woman claiming 35 years ago on a plane flight Trump fondled her.

Riddle me this Batman, think back to the 1980's, can you remember who you sat next to on any flight - spouses don't count.  I can't even get a mental image in my head and I only flew twice round trip the entire decade.

So Woodward and Bernstein inspired a whole generation of reporters who gave it up, left their morals and search for truth on the bathroom floor.

The fifth estate is dead. Long live the memory.  We now have a country where half the people pay no attention and 90% of the other half are totally brainwashed by DemBitches.