This is my second blog.

My first blog chronicled my experiences over three years caring for my dad as he lived through and finally died from Alzheimer's. That is the book that is for sale.

This second blog kind of chronicles of life, what it is like to start your life over in your late 50's. After caretaking, you are damaged, file bankruptcy, and the world doesn't care what you did. After 8 months of unemployment, you wake each day knowing the world doesn't want you. Finally you do find a job, 5 weeks before homelessness, but doing what you did 30 years ago and getting paid what you did 30 years ago. So this is starting over.

The object of life is not to be on the side of the majority, but to escape finding oneself in the ranks of the insane.

Sunday, May 31, 2015


Wish I had a great excuse for not having posted a thought in the last two weeks, but, perhaps I haven't had a thought yet.

Actually, when I was thinking about not thinking, I did have the thought to open a Twitter account and every day post something like "nothing to say today" or "wait, nope, nothing to say" and just do that everyday for a year and see if I could develop a following.

I've also been immersing myself in Jade Helm, Planet X, comets in September, and other such stuff; trying to put together some sort of pattern of things.  I do know this much, if nothing comes of all this Jade Helm thing, I can't wait to hear John Moore, Hag & Hag, Steve Quayle, Dave Hodges and others explain how they spent six months warning the country about the coming crappola and nothing happened.

Here's betting they take credit for nothing happening, saying they gave it so much publicity that the government couldn't carry it out.  And John Moore has to be the worse at scaring people with deadlines of this is going to happen and nothing happens.  I think I wrote once about one of his shows where Texas Troopers were warned to pack for a long period of not being home starting this weekend, which was last year sometime.  I can actually pull a thing from Stan Johnson with John Moore and Planet X where it was going to be here in 2012.  How does he have a following still?  Actually, another one is Lindsey Williams, crap, you can find interviews with him going back to the 1990's where the end of the world/economy/America was suppose to happen back then, and, well, here we are, I think we are still here.

But over the last 20 years, there are things that have floated out there that never connected to anything.  Like the 9/11 thing, which I don't buy into the conspiracy theory, but always wondered about the timing, the day after Rumsfeld announced the 2 trillion missing; or the day the buildings crashed down I wondered, what happens to all that gold that is stored underneath.  And all the debt, what has it been spent on?  Then there was that billions of rounds of hollow point ammo that the government bought a few years ago, then there was how two years ago you could not buy survival food anywhere because the government was buying it all up.


Something is coming down the pike and the government is preparing for it to happen.  The food, the bullets, the underground fortresses being built around the world, and Jade Helm is just putting the troops into place.  At least that is my theory.

Last weekend I watched several movies from one of my favorite genres, the 1950 alien attack end of the world type movies, Body Snatchers, When Worlds Collide, etc.  And in world's collide, what did the government do, secret projects to build ships for a select few to reach another planet.  Okay, I doubt that is what we are building, but if you dig around news stories you see where Russia has been building some new underground mountain hideaway, so has China, Sweden, and I suspect Germany, France and United Kingdom are doing the same.

Today, pulled out The Big Chill and watched it.  Great movie, though the scene where the guy asked is this a quaalude and I thought, gee, whatever happened to quaaludes?  But it's a great story of friends getting back together for the funeral of another college friend who commits suicide.  Little known trivia fact here, the dead body at the beginning getting 'dressed' for the coffin is actually played by Kevin Costner; originally the movie was going to have flashbacks to their 1960's college days but they were all cut so the only scene with Costner is the suit/shoe/hair thing at the beginning.  The director felt bad about it and later made sure he got a good role in Silverado to make up for it.

But it is a good movie to make you think, where you were in your youth and where you end up.  Which I can do for an afternoon but no longer, don't like 'living in the past'.  Plus, I was a little later in the time frame, late 70's for college and we didn't have all the change the world attitude like the 1st half baby boomers did, which later brought us the whole disco thing.  But we do change over time, some more than others, and never quite end up where we envisioned.

Our friends forever are lost over time, sometimes replaced by new friends, sometimes not, but can anyone really say their new friends met in the 30's 40's or 50's are really as close to us as those of our youth?  The walls and images we try so hard to maintain were not there in college, we were okay to be naked with those friends.  And for those who raise kids, promising themselves they will do it different than their parents, find themselves telling the same lies, the same yelling, and wondering what happened.

The unfinished paintings, the never written novel or book of poems, the songs never finished, all lie in our subconscious and when they reach our conscious, we throw them back, not wanting to think of the songs never sung, what we left behind.

Each choice we make, changes our destiny in some way.  Did I miss the love of my life by choosing Dallas over Austin?  Missing a train?  One job over another?  When we look back and start thinking of wishing we'd taken that offer, done something instead, we really don't realize our ability to think of that moment might have never happened had we made that choice, we might be dead because of that choice led to another and another that had us driving home on a road late at night in a state we never lived in where the drunk came over the line and our car was there instead of not there.

Coming out of college, I really had no goals, there was nothing I really wanted to do or be, just a girl I wanted to marry.  She didn't.  Dropped me out of the blue and it took me a long time to get over it but I came out with a new way to look at life.  Be healthy and happy with whatever I do, it doesn't really matter, what, just be happy while you are doing it.

And that is my goal.  I've been fortunate and blessed with good health, my diet and exercising helps with that, and for the most part I've been happy, even when taking care of my dad and all that it did, there was a happiness in me for doing it, for not giving in, for fighting the good fight.  Now, the 8 months of rejection and unemployment didn't leave me with being real happy, in fact whatever bitterness I have came from those months, not the months with my dad, but I think I've washed that from my life.

So when I look back at those college years, who I was and who I am today, I really don't get a lot of 'what happened to me' or 'how did I get here' thoughts because there really wasn't some dream to be crushed, compromised, or sold.

Healthy and happy.  Sweat the small daily stuff so you will be prepared for the blizzards of life.  Watch the road for an opportunity, run with it, enjoy it while it lasts, then do something else.

Back to the movie for a moment.  Those actors/actresses were really the cream of the crop at that moment in time, yet what happened to them?  When was the last time you saw Mary Kay Place, Tom Berringer, Meg Tilly, JoBeth Williams, or  Kevin Klein?  Maybe they are on TV and I just don't see them.  Glenn Close, William Hurt have made some movies and such in the past decades, Jeff Goldblum probably had the best career with big movies with Jurassic and Independence Day, but this cream of the crop of 30 year old actors, I wonder how many of them sit around and wonder what happened to their careers, they way they sat around in this movie wondering what became of their dreams.

Or, maybe Glenn Close hit the nail on the head in the movie, when she asked "was it all just.... fashionable?"

Ooh, I bet you're wonderin' how I knew
'Bout your plans to make me blue
With some other guy you knew before
Between the two of us guys you know I love you more
It took me by surprise I must say
When I found out yesterday
Don'tcha know that I

Heard it through the grapevine
Not much longer would you be mine
Oh I heard it through the grapevine
Oh I'm just about to lose my mind
Honey, honey yeah
(Heard it through the grapevine)
(Not much longer would you be my baby, ooh, ooh, ooh)

I know a man ain't supposed to cry
But these tears I can't hold inside
Losin' you would end my life you see
'Cause you mean that much to me
You could have told me yourself
That you love someone else
Instead I

Heard it through the grapevine

Creedence Clearwater Revival

Sunday, May 17, 2015


Spending the afternoon watching Elizabeth Warren YouTube videos from the last decade.  Fascinating stuff, might take some screen shots and do a blog on it.  And with this wonderful new trade deal, details are all secret, that Obama wants to get approved and our Republican Senate that we voted into office did their job and completely caved to go along with Obama on the deal.  Warren, on the other hand, led the filibuster to temporarily stop it.

So the liberal senator from Mass did what we expected the republicans to do.

I think we should replace everyone working in the WH, congress, DC, and the media with illegal aliens who will gladly do those jobs for minimum wage and probably be a hell of a lot more honest about it.  I wonder how much Mitch McConnell and other republicans stock portfolios will go up with this trade agreement?  And I'm sorry, we got smoked on NAFTA and we got smoked on GANT and if you think we are not going to get smoked on this one, you are nuts.

So, I've been following this Jade Helm thing scratching my head trying to figure out what is going on and what is BS versus what is fact - in other words, don't believe the government, don't believe the media, don't believe the 'conspiracy shows'.  There are some seriously bothersome things happening though, that are factual.  So putting aside the possibility the government is doing this just to gander up all the conspiracy sites and conspiracy shows and when nothing happens they will all look like idiots, here is what came up.

First of all, the closed WalMarts.  These are true, there were at least six WalMart in the south/southwest, that all announced closings immediately, all for 'plumbing issues' and employees had no warning and were given 2 months severance pay.  Pictures taken by 'spies' outside the stores after closing show police and military vehicles.  Factual.  Something IS going on.  The military does not do plumbing.

Lots of pictures of military movements of equipment throughout the south and southwest.  Is this more than normal?  I don't know.  And it does bother me this Jade Helm map that is going around nearly exactly matches the map of that group that wants to take back part of America for Mexico which is odd.

Theories abound.  From the roundup of troublemakers, christians, etc to simply the military practicing.
Military practicing.  What exactly are they practicing?  Where are we planning to fight a war where we need helicopters to fly thru the cities skyscraper section like downtown Chicago?

Over the years, you can find videos of underground bases being built, from the Denver airport to in the Ozarks and many other locations.  A shortage of stored foods a couple of years ago due to a huge government purchase.  The billions of rounds of ammunition the government purchased a few years ago.  Factual and provable.

So, step back and try to connect dots, read a bit, and finally a story that was in some places and suddenly things fit.

They are expecting a meteor hit in September.  Fact or fiction?  I don't know.  BUT, go with a meteor hit come September and suddenly all of this stuff falls into place.  There are several 'prophets' who have been predicting such an event, to smack into the Atlantic Ocean, for several years now.  Are they truly prophets or paid spokespeople?

Think about the trillions of dollars we've spent year after year as our debt went from 4 trillion at the end of Clinton's term to 8 for Bush and now 18 for Obama.  What have we bought with all that money?  Do you see any improvements?  Where did it go?  How could they spend that kind of money unless they knew they would not be paying it back?  That some event would occur that would make it all obsolete?  Think of the 'missing' 2trillion announced the day before 9/11 - one of the only things that make me suspicious of 9/11 - and all the other departments in government missing 1 trillion?

What if it was spent building underground safety cities?  Or all the quakes going on or those mysterious booms people have been hearing for 10 years, or that strange quake on the east coast a few years ago - what if that is building underground cities and tunnels?  All because of potential hit by a meteor?

We know Russia and China are building huge underground areas, supposedly to protect the people in the event of nuclear war, but what if that is just an excuse or cover story?

And think, if this was determined in the 1990's, well, they came out with two movies showing a meteor headed to earth, one that Willis blows up and saves the planet and the other where the east coast is not to lucky.  Was that some sort of clever warning?

By the way, if you want to know another strange thing, go look up the sport of caving and you will find stories how so many caves in the US have been sealed up and locked up in the last 10 years.  Why are they doing that?  Oh, bat disease.

So if a meteor is heading towards us, would they tell us?  Hell no!  Let's face it, if they said "My fellow Americans, in five years, in September 2015, a meteor is going to strike the Earth and we have no idea how bad it will be, it may end all life on the planet, some may survive, but most will not, so have a nice day".  What would happen?  Chaos.  Many would go total goblin.  Others would stock up and try to find a place to survive, others would pray, but who would go to work?  We'd all run up credit cards to the max until they stopped honoring credit cards.

In other words, the official notice of such an event will be at the last possible moment.  After the elite are moved to their 'safe places'.  You can bet if the president lands in Denver in September then disappears you better pack the car and head to the hills.  And yes, I have been searching for caves in Colorado.  Without Bat Disease.

So is Jade Helm putting the military in place to be ready for the meteor strike?  Are the WalMarts going to be processing centers or something else?  I don't know.

The point of all this, is something very strange about this whole Jade Helm thing.  And the one thing that connects the dots is some sort of massive earth change, a meteor that will smack into the earth causing extensive damage, changes, etc.  It fits the facts, it does explain the behavior.

Fortunately, my theories never pan out, so relax.  And if I am right, well, big deal, no satisfaction will be felt.

Okay, maybe a little.

I feel the earth move under my feet
I feel the sky tumblin' down, a tumblin' down
I feel the earth move under my feet
I feel the sky tumblin' down, a tumblin' down
I just a lose control
Down to my very soul
I get a hot and cold
All over, all over, all over, all over

I feel the earth move under my feet
I feel the sky tumblin' down, a tumblin' down
I feel the earth move under my feet
I feel the sky tumblin' down, a tumblin' down
A tumblin' down, a tumblin' down, a tumblin' down
Tumblin' down

Carole King

Wednesday, May 13, 2015


Some of the best internet surfing is starting at a link, like say from Drudge, then when you are done with that article, you see a link, then another, then another and soon find yourself miles from where you started on a topic you never considered.  So today I found myself coming across two articles with seven degrees of separation, the first was a survey done in Britain of the 30 Greatest TV Detectives/Cops.

Now, obviously the survey would be skewed towards English shows a little - I mean an American survey probably after saying Sherlock Holmes would be hard pressed to name another British show - but I was yelling as I read the article.  I grew up on American TV and now watch predominately European detective shows

I mean, Magnum PI is 30th?  Luther 28th? Rockford 27th?  Life on Mars 22nd?  Morse 13th?  No Monk?

Police Woman 18th?  Kojak 14th?  Here's looking at you and Police Woman ahead of Rockford, Magnum, Luther or LoM???   And no Monk?  Where was this survey done, at the The Terminal Mad Cow Disease Hospital?

I mean I watched Starsky and Hutch, but 8th place?  Try, I mean really try, to recite the plot to, oh, say three episodes of S&H?  I'm waiting.

Now, The Killing - Danish version - got 5th and Sherlock got 4th but how do you put Sherlock 4th and completely ignore the Jeremy Brett version of Sherlock Holmes that ruled the 70's, 80's and 90's?

NYPD Blues got 2nd place and The Wire got first.  Really?  Seriously?

And your thinking, "oh no, he's made his own list!"  And so I did, but how you doing on that S&H question?

  1. Inspector Morse
  2. Life on Mars
  3. Foyle's War  (how did they leave this out of their list???)
  4. Luther
  5. The Killing Danish Version
  6. Irene Huss  (If you never saw this, it's a treat, subtitled I know, but amazing show)
  7. Sherlock 
  8. Holmes Brett
  9. Xfiles (no Mulder, no Scully, no shit?)
  10. Monk  (Another one I cannot believe was left off the list)
  11. Magnum P.I.
  12. Inspector Lynley
  13. Rockford
  14. Sweeney  (John Thaw's first big series, this is the show that was copied as S&H in the states
  15. Wallender (I"ve only seen the English version, haven't yet watched the swedish version)
  16. Midsummer Murders
  17. Inspector Lewis
  18. Columbo (here's what I didn't like, seeing who was guilty from the beginning)
  19. DCI Banks
  20. NYPD Blue
  21. Peter gunn  (just the jazz singing of Lola Albright is enough to put this on the list)
  22. S&H (yea, I liked it, especially the 12 hour episode that was on the nite I shroomed in college
  23. HSB

All the while, there was another story that just about floored me in the Telegraph.  Want to see the future?  To think, governments are seriously talking and considering this is terrifying.  Knowing that they are planning to implement it is evil.

In this futuristic world, all payments are made by contactless card, mobile phone apps or other electronic means, while notes and coins are abolished. Your current account will no longer be held with a bank, but with the government or the central bank. Banks still exist, and still lend money, but they get their funds from the central bank, not from depositors.

Having everyone’s account at a single, central institution allows the authorities to either encourage or discourage people to spend. To boost spending, the bank imposes a negative interest rate on the money in everyone’s account – in effect, a tax on saving.
Faced with seeing their money slowly confiscated, people are more likely to spend it on goods and services. When this change in behaviour takes place across the country, the economy gets a significant fillip.
The recipient of cash responds in the same way, and also spends. Money circulates more quickly – or, as economists say, the “velocity of money” increases.
What about the opposite situation – when the economy is overheating? The central bank or government will certainly drop any negative interest on credit balances, but it could go further and impose a tax on transactions.
So whenever you use the money in your account to buy something, you pay a small penalty. That makes people less inclined to spend and more inclined to save, so reducing economic activity.
Such an approach would be a far more effective way to damp an overheated economy than today’s blunt tool of a rise in the central bank’s official interest rate.


Your money, your income, that which you trade your labor, knowledge, skills and intelligence for, will no longer belong to you.  It goes from your company to the government bank account where they can control how you spend and when you spend.  

No worry about paying taxes anymore, they will just take it from your account, any time they want.  No stockpiling cash for emergencies, there is no cash.  You are a slave, you are a sheep.

They will tell us when to spend, when not to spend, probably who we can buy from.  

Think about this, your credits are in a government controlled account and your government health care system and they look at your health records and your spending records and what next?  Approval/disapproval at the grocery store check out lanes?  Will the government let you buy that car you want, get married, contribute to a church?  Will individuals only be affected, or businesses too?  Will the government decide who you will buy your raw materials from?  This is absolutely mind boggling.  Ira Levin's This Perfect Day is coming closer and closer to reality.

And the band plays on.....

Like a hurricane around your heart
When earth and sky are torn apart
He comes gathering up the bits
While hoping that the puzzle fits

He leads you, he leads you
Freedom rider

With a silver star between his eyes
That open up at hidden lies
Big man crying with defeat
See people gathering in the street

You feel him, you freak him
Freedom rider

When lightning strikes you to the bone
You turn around, you're all alone
By the time you hear that siren sound
Then your soul is in the lost and found

Forever, forever
Freedom rider


Saturday, May 9, 2015


Okay, not sure what is going on, but went to bed last night, end of the work week, at 12:30, which is my normal time but since I have Saturday's off now, no alarm and I slept to 1:15pm.

What the hell is that about?

I normally get about 8 hours each night, so why suddenly 13 hours?  Weird.  Now, of course, I'm pretty sure I won't be able to get to sleep tonite after getting 13 hours of sleep, which is just going to throw everything off, so I might just stay up all night cleaning, cause Lord knows my apartment needs cleaning.  Hell, at this point if I walked into a service station, I'd probably marvel at how clean their bathroom is.

I guess Colorado has a new rainy season, two or three years in a row now, May has just been nothing but rain.  First three years out here, it didn't rain in May or June historically, rains came with the monsoon season in the pacific in July.  But for two weeks now, every day it is rain rain rain.  Rivers are not yet at flood stage but it's almost inevitable at this point we are going to see flooding soon.  And to top it off, it is going to stop raining tonight...... and we are expecting 5 to 10 inches of heavy wet snow. On May 10th.  Strange Days.

Yesterday I ran a couple of errands at lunch, and stopped at a restaurant - I keep feeling like I wrote this already but checked yesterdays blog and it wasn't there so got me - and suddenly noticed everyone in the restaurant, except me, were dressed in black, dark blue, or dark grey.  Me, I've got a Texas Red long sleeve T shirt and my yellow, laugh at me all you want but it's the best, raincoat.  And today at the grocery store which was an utter madhouse, same thing.  Everyone is dark colors.  Funny how the weather seems to affect the clothing choices of people.  Or is it just a reflection of the mood of a country that knows, deep down, something wicked this way comes.

Which also made me think about something.  All the prepping in the world and it dawned on me if society broke down and you were living somewhere and the weather turned and you got three weeks of 40/50 degree weather and rain every day, most people will die very soon afterwards.  I don't think even the best preppers are prepared to be soaking wet in that cold.

Are we coming to a major snap this summer?  So far this year we've had two major breakouts of rioting in MO and Baltimore.  Is this going to be our long hot summer?

I do blame those folks, and I don't.  We've developed a system in this country that basically designed the desperation we see in the inner cities.  Frankly, the Great Society of LBJ, on of the more bigoted men to ever sit in the Oval Office, so we rounded up all the blacks, stuck them in housing projects, then moved all the jobs in manufacturing overseas, allowed illegal immigrants to come and take what lower level jobs were left and left them with nothing.  We paid them to have kids out of wedlock, we supplied hard drugs to them and then go on a rampage that fills corporate prisons with millions of black men and women for drugs when there might be a pretty strong case that the US government has been involved in bringing the drugs into this country in the first place.  The schools suck and just pass them along and those that finish have the education that use to get people past 3rd grade, not high school.  And in spite of the spirit of Margaret Sanger's Planned Parenthood to control the black population thru abortion and the millions of babies aborted in our inner cities, we've created a massive block of the population that will very soon rise up in violence across this country.  Uneducated, no dads, no jobs, drugs, and guns.

Jeepers, at least the Indians got a lot of land when we shuffled them off.  But that combination is why you should never give up your guns, might as well let the police shoot you dead, probably be more humane than what will happen if there is a huge uprising across this nation of the poor.

Martin Luther King, your dream is hereby declared dead. Noble try though.  Too bad your message was picked up by Jessie and Al, who were always more interested in fame and fortune than actually improving society.

Was the 60's the last decade of great dreamers?  Men and women who saw a better future?  Now our dreamers design computer hardware and software to enslave a nation.  How many different worlds do we live in?  Science loves to speculate of parallel universes but why look there, just look around.  Do you really think you live on the same planet as the blacks in the ghetto?  Or people in the middle east?  Or Africa, our person petrie dish for scientific experiments because people in america cringe at the idea of testing things on dogs, so let us use Africans!  Reality to a black in a ghetto is so much different that reality to some white dude living in a nice home in the suburbs - heck, even in a condo in some city.

I wonder how many people have ever tried to figure out, if there was a major power outage, how can you get home from downtown to your suburban home without going thru a 'ghetto'?  I tried to figure that out once when I lived in Chicago and it would have taken about a 100 mile hike to get from downtown to a southwest suburb without going thru a 'bad area'.

Even Art has moved from warning people of a future to almost brainwashing us towards this future.  Somewhere in the 1990's it started, rather than movies, TV shows and books trying to warn us of the dangers of the road we were on, it became making us look forward to being Borg.  Creating Terminators. Becoming HomoTechni - how cool it will be to be the Borg.

But what to do with all these wastes of humanity, those animals breeding in ghettos, those religious nuts, constitutional nuts, individualists who won't play along?

I don't know if anyone reading this blog and also read my book will remember one of the blogs I wrote talking about SV40 and how I hesitated to even write it.  SV40 is a monkey virus that was in the polio vaccine.  It causes cancers.  They realized in 1959 that it was in the vaccine and kept using it until 1964.  Tens of millions of kids were injected with the virus in the vaccine.  Funny thing is, incidents of cancer in this country just took off around 1960.  There is a hockey stick graph that is not faked.  And I speculated that if you wanted to really solve the financial burdens of this nation, just figure out a way to put something in the food supple or flu vaccines that would cause that SV40 to kick off, not in around 20% of the population, but in 90% of the population and you could wipe out the baby boomer generation, making Social Security instantly solvent for decades, medicare solvent for decades, and think of all those retirement accounts earlier generations would get after the trillions in estate taxes collected by the government.  Our debt would go from 19 trillion to less than 10 trillion in a year or so.

I think about these things.  I think what plans are in place to deal with the inner cities catching fire and going on rampages throughout cities and suburbs of a population recently unarmed by the government. Millions killed, military cleans up and exterminates the perps ridding society of millions of people who are not contributing.  While the elite sit it out in underground cities around the country.

This is what writers in the 50's and 60's and earlier wrote about, foresaw as the logical conclusion to what they saw happening.  New societies born on the blood and violence, clean controlled worlds out of the chaos and planning of people with no names.

But what of God's plan, you cry?  Well, if you sit in church tomorrow morning, you will sing some songs, maybe even dance in the aisles as rock bands work you into a frenzy, and a bible verse is referred to as the preacher talks about how great mothers are, tell some golf metaphor, and not a word will be mentioned of our culture, not a word about Christians being executed overseas - dragged out of their homes and beheaded for YouTube  - because no matter what denomination you are, your pastors was taught by theologians who were taught, by theologians who were taught that before all this bad stuff happens you will be swept up to heaven and miss the whole thing.  I wonder if those Christians kneeling on the sand about to get their heads chopped off believed in a pretrib rapture.  Oh well.

Unfortunately, you won't, it's not there.  Not in the Bible.  Earliest reference to what is known as pretrib rapture comes centuries after Christ.  So what ever is coming our way, you will go through it and probably not survive it.  And if you or I fail in our faith, if we go along to live, we will get it in the end. And if we don't give in, we get it sooner rather than later.  But then, why try to hold onto something you won't get to keep anyways?

Strange days we live in and they are only going to get stranger.

The Indian Serenade

   I arise from dreams of thee
In the first sweet sleep of night,
When the winds are breathing low,
And the stars are shining bright:
I arise from dreams of thee,
And a spirit in my feet
Hath led me—who knows how?
To thy chamber window, Sweet!

   The wandering airs they faint
On the dark, the silent stream—
The Champak odours fail
Like sweet thoughts in a dream;
The Nightingale's complaint,
It dies upon her heart;—
As I must on thine,
Oh, belov├Ęd as thou art!

   Oh lift me from the grass!
I die! I faint! I fail!
Let thy love in kisses rain
On my lips and eyelids pale.
My cheek is cold and white, alas!
My heart beats loud and fast;—
Oh! press it to thine own again,
Where it will break at last.

Friday, May 8, 2015


Funny how the the train always comes around in a circle.

Back in the 1980's, working for Business Software in Dallas Texas and the owner insisted guys wear suits.  I sat at a desk, rarely ever saw a customer, but had to wear a damn suit to take support calls.  Funny thing is, they were construction companies where the owners probably hadn't worn a suit to work in 30 years.

So, I fought it, finally got the owner to agree to one Casual Friday each month.  Was it my fault I could never remember which Friday it was?  Golly, I'm sorry, I thought this WAS the last Friday of the month boss!

Fast forward 30 years and I work for one of those companies that embrace and insist on casual.  I mean lordy, saw a gal in a conference call today and wasn't sure where the top began and the tattoos ended; I know a couple of people that work in PJ's, underwear and I suspect a few in the nude.

Don't get me wrong, I love getting up in the morning, throwing on the jeans, a long sleeve T shirt and away I go.  But when you work for a company that promotes casual, insists on casual, requires casual, there is only one thing a man can do.

So last week, I instituted Formal Friday on the first Friday of each month.  Yep, got up, put on a suit and tie and went to work.  Team meeting that day and everyone is like "why are you wearing a suit" and I explained it to them, forever cementing in their minds that I'm nuts.

As if daily posts in chat of selections of Shelley or Tennyson wasn't sign enough.

Train has come full circle.  They guy who once pushed casual to show independence in a Brooks Brothers Dress For Success World now has to dress in a suit to feed the non conformist soul.

Moving along now.........

What is cheating?  What does it mean to fudge and manipulate the numbers to promote a position and hide the truth?

Climate scientists have been caught three or four times in the past couple of years, changing data, using one system of rounding to make temps lower in the past and a different system of rounding to make them higher today; they use one 'system of measure' to make their claims of global warming and totally ignore two other measurement methodologies and systems that are actually more robust and show no warming over the past 16 years.

Can you imagine how the media would cover the findings that a pharmaceutical company had manipulated data over a drug study?  Think of the millions of dollars that have been spent in the last 20 years by consumers and businesses meeting new regulations for a problem that doesn't actually exist?

Or the headlines today that unemployment is down to 5.3%; can anyone explain to me why hundreds of millions of people can't understand that unemployment cannot be going down when the number of people of working age who need jobs is increasing?  There are almost 95 million people in this country not working; there are only 350 million people in the country.  Take out those under 18 and those over 65 and 95 million makes up about 40% of the remaining population.

Forty percent unemployment?  Oh, it gets juicier.  Turns out over 80% of the jobs created last month went to, are you ready, immigrants.  Legal and illegal.

Or, perhaps you caught the article where the government has been lying for 15 years about the SS system and it's even in worse shape than even conspiracy nuts like me thought.

This stuff is criminal.  Intentionally manipulating numbers to promote a position other than what the data actually says will get you fired in any corporation.  It will get you disbarred, it will cost you your medical license, it will even cost a tenured professor their position.

But with all of this criminal behavior, how could Drudge possibly decide which to use for a headline?  Well, he went with what really bothers people.  Not scientists faking data, not the government lying about the financial health of the group that takes 15% out of the paychecks of anyone who may still have a job, well, unless that job is with certain parts of the federal government, not the so obvious removal of millions of unemployed middle aged citizens or young people with college degrees, 100k in loans, and no jobs because the system is filling jobs will illegal aliens or legal immigrants on a visa that can do the job for 1/3 what an american would have to be paid because said legal aliens are exempt from employers needing to pay for their OBAMACARE HEALTH INSURANCE.

No, the headline was Tom Brady knew about the deflating of footballs.  Now do you understand why I almost root for the meteor or volcano to create that 200ft tidal wave to wipe out all life on the east coast?  Or the solar flare to fry all the electricity and electronics on the planet?  Because I want to stand on the mountain top looking at all the confused masses and say "YOU WERE NOT F*&**ING LISTENING"

Just as long as it's not on the first friday of the month, I'd hate to have to do it in a suit and tie.

Oh, I'm reaching out for something
Touching nothing's all I ever do
Oh, I softly call you over
When you appear there's nothing left of you
Now the man in the back
Is ready to crack as he raises his hands to the sky
And the girl in the corner is everyone's mourner
She could kill you with a wink of her eye

Oh yeah, it was electric, so frantically hectic
And the band started leaving, 'cause they all stopped breathing
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

And the man at the back said everyone attack
And it turned into a ballroom blitz
And the girl in the corner said boy, I wanna warn ya
It'll turn into a ballroom blitz
Ballroom blitz