This is my second blog.

My first blog chronicled my experiences over three years caring for my dad as he lived through and finally died from Alzheimer's. That is the book that is for sale.

This second blog kind of chronicles of life, what it is like to start your life over in your late 50's. After caretaking, you are damaged, file bankruptcy, and the world doesn't care what you did. After 8 months of unemployment, you wake each day knowing the world doesn't want you. Finally you do find a job, 5 weeks before homelessness, but doing what you did 30 years ago and getting paid what you did 30 years ago. So this is starting over.

The object of life is not to be on the side of the majority, but to escape finding oneself in the ranks of the insane.

Thursday, October 10, 2013


I wrote Bill O'Reilly last night.  I see his latest book has now sold over 1/4 of a million copies.  I'm not sure how much of the book he writes, whether the other guy's name on the cover does the research, the writing, or both.  I remember so many times O'Reilly talking about hard work and persistence is what it takes to get ahead in life.

So I wrote Bill and asked him why, when all he does is put his name on a book, it sells 1/4 of a million copies and I spend four years in the hell known as a caretaker for my dad with Alzheimer's while he sits on his ass for an hour a day in NY making millions, why his book sells 1/4 of a million and I have sold 16 copies of my book.  Who worked harder on his book?  Who bled for his words?

So much for the theory of hard work.  My plan for living in my car next year is looking better all the time.  I must be some sort of masochist to think like that but the truth is I solve problems.  Getting a job and spending 8 years paying off the debt is not a solution, it's pushing the problem down the road.  Live in the car for a year with a low paying job and I can wipe out most of the debt in one year, finish my masters in Theology, and be free to move forward if I live through the year.  Let's face it, being homeless is an invitation for arrest by cops, just for the hell of it.  But it still solves the problem in one year.

Of course, there is always just not paying off the loan and credit card as an option, but some stupid fool like me has this 'right thing to do' theory on living and I'm not going to change now, no matter how stupid it makes me.

Which brings me to the topic of the blog today; solving problems.  Washington is shutdown and finger pointing is going on in both directions, which is fair because both parties are responsible for the financial mess this country is living.  Nice thing about being in the 50's is we remember when the debate was that the budget deficit was almost a billion dollars.  For a year. And you know the funny thing?  That wasn't that long ago. Today, our budget deficit is 5 billion dollars a day. Do the math, 5 billion a day.  Can't blame one party for this mess, both parties and all of us are responsible for the mess.

Think about that my imaginary readers, five billion dollars a day shortfall.  And in the 1980's, it was approaching 1 billion for the year.  Not 30 years past.

What is strange, well besides me being in a good mood today, is that for over 100 days this past summer, the federal deficit was frozen just below the limit.  Never moved.  Nada.  But now, in October, the start of the new fiscal year, with ObamaCare kicking in, and all the appropriation bills sent from the house to the senate have yet to see a vote, suddenly we have all three hitting at once and if that debt limit that was frozen for over 100 days is suddenly wanting to boom, it's the perfect storm and it was all designed to come down to this by someone in DC.

When Harry Reid chose not to allow any appropriation bills sent by the house to be approved or not approved, he was forcing this moment in time.  When the house said here is the bill but we won't fund ObamaCare, they were forcing this moment in time.  And when the agency responsible screwed with the numbers to freeze the debt just below the limit for over 100 days and now it's wanting to burst through the limit, they were forcing this moment in time.  For what purpose?  To make sure the debt limit is raised once again?  To make sure ObamaCare continues?  For political purposes?  Look at what they have shutdown. National parks, memorials, vet benefits.  But the congressional health clubs and restaurants are still open!

And every furloughed federal worker will get backpay for the work they missed.  Yep, it's like a free paid vacation for every federal worker.  Where do I sign up?

So, let it happen.  Let's go bankrupt.  Let the fed not pay their debts, let all of us not pay our debts.  Let's just wipe the slate clean!   At some point, we all know this day is coming, we fold, the house of cards falls around us, then we can pick up the pieces after much rioting, maybe some hangings, and all sorts of evil are unleashed upon the land.  The demons are barking at the gates of hell wanting to be unleashed on America.   Rather do it now than in 15 years when I'm too old to deal with it.  Besides, I'm already broke.  Can't take much from a man who has nothing worth stealing.

We've run up the credit cards pretty close to what is the maximum.  Would you buy a US bond?  Seriously?  China and other countries see this coming, they are buying gold left and right, with our dollars by the way.  All that chinese crap we've been buying is funding China, India, and others to buy their gold supplies while ours is probably all gone.  Rumors are Fort Knox is empty, the gold is long gone.  Our government has been dumping it; banks have been selling the same ounce 20 times, and it's all going to come crashing down.

So let it happen.  It's over.  Everyone knows it's over.  We are kicking a dead horse expecting it to get up and it's dead folks.  And remember, in my old blog, and in this blog, I've been warning you that the Fed Reserve buying 40 billion in mortgages each month for the past three years is really CHINA buying up those mortgages and when the whole thing crashes don't be surprised to see some china man and his family standing on your doorstep with the deed to your house.

We've been electing con-men for years.  They can't keep this up much longer and when it's about to fall, you can bet they will be heading for those underground cities under Denver airport, in the Ozarks, and several other locations as if that will protect them.

Well let it happen.  And after all these elite idiots barricade themselves underground, let's get the welders and steelworkers left in this country to go weld the doors shut on their underground cities forever.  Do you really think the soldiers left outside in the chaos won't be willing to let the welders through?

I'm feelin' so alone now
They cut the telephone now
Yeah my life is just a mess

I threw it all away now
I could have made a fortune
I lost the craving for success...

And as the acrobats they tumble
So the corn begins to crumble
While in the mirror
She admires a brand new dress...

Live on the second floor now
They're tryin' to bust the door down
Soon I'll have a new address...

So much for liberation
They'll have a celebration
Yeah I've been under too much stress

And as the clouds begin to rumble
So the juggler makes his fumble
And the sun upon my wall is getting less